There are some basic differences between a Who vs. Whom, although they may not always be black and white. For the sake of discussion, we will refer to him as Him and refer to her as his wife. When we say, "He is my spouse," we are merely using a label to identify him with another person. His existence is non-existent in any transaction we engage in with another person.

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A Whom is simply that - a female person. If you knew the gender of that Whom would you use? Would you use a male or female? Wouldn't it make more sense to use the one you were born? How about if we said, "Jenny is my friend." Or "Nancy is my sister."

 

In situations like these, you are left with a choice. You can either use the title "He" or "She" to identify the two of them at a glance. What if you are in a situation where your partner has called you by his or her name, do you automatically assume that person is a female? Do you automatically assume that he or she is a male?

Do You Know the Difference Between Who Vs Whom?

 

We often use pronouns (he/she, she/him) and names (my husband, my friend) that are descriptive only. We don't look at the person's actual gender. We don't use a title that explains a person's gender. This is why some people find it "icky" when another guy gives their wife a gift but doesn't use her last name.

 

Some people use the word "we" to describe gender. "We men" or "our women" refer to the biological sex of a person. "The guys" or "our guys" are those who have had a family or are related to someone who has had a family. It would be hard to call ourselves women by this standard, even though we are biologically female. "My husband" or "my husband's" would be more descriptive than "our guys".

 

Then there is unisex names. These are simply baby names, whether they are male or female. An example of this might be Robert, Michael and John. This list goes on.

 

If you go through any public records, you will find countless instances of people with the same names, but different genders. Some of these people were married and later divorced. Many times, those who have the same names are actually of the same sex. If this is true for you, then the chances of finding the name you're looking for are slim to none.

 

The best way to search out certain names is to use a specialized website that specializes in people's searches. These websites have members who are constantly scouring the public records and they are updated as and when new additions are made. They are not limited to just names. If you know the exact spelling of a name, they have it as well!

 

The first step to doing this is to find one. Just as in a job interview, you have to weed out the bad candidates by studying their profiles. Take note of anyone who has an obvious not-so-attractive trait. For instance, if you see someone's name that rhymes, chances are, they are probably a female. You can also refine your search by typing in someone's name that sounds similar, or double checking the spelling.

 

Once you have found a good website, you need to input as much information as you can. Remember, this includes their name, address, telephone number and current city and state. Make sure to include contact information such as e-mail, social networking sites and relatives. If you know their phone number, type it in as well. You can also put in a recent photo. If you feel like you've found the perfect match, click on "advanced search" and choose the type of search you want to do.

 

Upon entering in all of this data, you will receive back a handful of possible matches. If you see two names that are close to your ideal match, then go with the one that's closer. On the other hand, if you don't see a lot of similarity between your ideal candidate's name and yours, try looking at their email address, telephone number or any other contact information. Try typing their name into one of these tools as well. If you haven't gotten any hits, then this process isn't effective.

 

Now, there are some instances where you may not be able to make a decision. In these cases, you will have to use other methods. Some examples include typing the full name and using the letters A - Z or the alphabet. There are plenty more ways to research who you want to date but if you get stuck, you can always come back to this list.

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